Posted By admin on February 26, 2011

Nobody could live in complying with impossible expectations. Nobody can impose them without being disappointed. If you persist, the resentment of the one partner, and the unmet needs of the other will destroy the relationship.
When unachievable is expected in a relationship, it becomes impossible.

1. Do not expect your partner to be everything for you (or give up everything for you)

It is impossible for someone to be everything you need. If you start with the knowledge that you have everything you need, you will never think of it looking at another. And you won’t expect anyone to leave everything for another person.
You and your partner are unique and it must remain so. The expectations that  your partner will give up what makes him/her unique is the worst kind of emotional blackmail. In essence, you say “I fell in love with you, as such as you was, now, to keep my love, you need to change.”

2. Do not expect your partner to read your thoughts.

People think that once they are together for some time, there is a kind of unspoken connection between them. It is not true! Nobody is obliged to guess your wishes, even if you think that they are obvious. If you want to take responsibility yourself for the connection, you must be willing to ask for what you need!

Often we say: “If he loved me, he would know what I want” or “If she loved me, she would know what to do.” This is a real deception, which replace the honest and responsible communication. Express what you want, otherwise you just won’t  get it!

3. Do not expect your partner to take responsibility for your happiness

The refusal to accept responsibility for your happiness is refusing to be happy. No matter whether you believe that by creating guilt, by causing, intimidating or coercing someone to take responsibility for your happiness,it will be possible.

Such a view is first in the list of examples of incapacitating choice, immediately after quitting his own honor.
Think about what to take to create true happiness in your life, then do it. This is absolutely necessary for your personal power, harmony. If you assign responsibility for the happiness of the others, it is guaranteed that you will never experience it.

4. Do not assume your partner should always agree on everything

There are no two people who have identical views and approaches to life. While it is easy to agree on most things, for the others it might not be. Differences on substantive issues in life could lead to confrontation. But it can be met through full communication and mutual concessions.

To deal with a problem, first you must agree that everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Do not blame and do not attack each other because of the different views. Try to get to the middle option.
To create a harmonious relationship with your partner, it is necessary first to bring harmony within yourself. It is impossible to achieve harmony with another person if you are in disharmony. Prior to expect these qualities from your partner, you should educate them in yourself.

If you are looking for support in your relationship, start supporting yourselves.

Every little expression of affection is an incentive for relationships and nurtures the relationship. Every touch says: “I’m glad you’re here.” Every loving glance or a light hug speaks: “I would choose you again and again.”

Categories: Happiness
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